A Story: A Person Writes About How They Stopped Self Injury

A Story: A Person Writes About How They Stopped Self Injury

Leaving no stone unturned! As a mom of a beautiful child who injures, I intend to continue researching ways that help my Grace.  Today I have decided, instead of looking to those “experts” who

Age-standardised disability-adjusted life year...

Age-standardised disability-adjusted life year (DALY) rates from Self-inflicted injuries by country (per 100,000 inhabitants). (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

treat our children who mutilate their bodies, I am reading stories of hope and recovery. Therefore I will turn to those amazing experts who injured themselves and found ways to recover.

This article is just one of many telling the stories of strength, the ability to overcome depression and how self-injury was a tool that helped them fight their way through their depression. It is not a recommended form of practice from this mom. However, it is critical that I find ways of looking through my daughter’s lens. This article deepened my understanding and pushed me to ask; how is cutting a form of treatment when one in so deep inside their heads that they need to bleed themselves? What does my Grace get from this practice? Lastly, how did others find their way out of self-injury?

Psychologists – Our Children’s Therapists and Mistakes I Made

Have you ever visited your kid’s therapist and was told that you were not supposed to tell when your kid has injured his/herself because it goes against the psychodynamic theory they are experimenting on your kid?

You are told that your child and their therapist must develop a relationship of trust and it is up to the child to tell the therapist when they have injured.

You are told that if the injury is not life threatening, don’t mention it to your child’s therapist because this talk between your child’s therapist and you will damage their relationship.

Does this sound right to you?

Where was my head in all of this? I will tell you where…wrapped in so much worry and fear, looking to those who were strongly suggested to me by my kid’s pediatrician and  professors of child psychology from an esteemed university.

I did not see the big picture back then-nor was there the research there is today.

If any psychologist tells you not to tell them when your kid injures, it is my recommendation that you run away as fast as you can after you have told them they are full of it.

We did this therapy for far too long. We were told from our kid’s therapist that they had lively and engaging discussions. According to the therapist, her client-my kid-was fully engaged.

So what! Engaged in what? Why am I not able to ask the content or at least the topics addressed?

If your kid is like any other teen; afraid, easily embarrassed, keeping things secret, worried about what others think of them and a good conversationalist – then this is what could happen in an experimental psychological theory that is applied to these types of therapy sessions:  A time where a teen can talk about only those things she wants her therapist to know because she can do, act, say, flunk out of History, French and Biology whilst she is cutting up her wrists and NOT MENTION anything about what is honestly troubling her BECAUSE Dad cannot tell the therapist that this is what is really going on in his daughter’s life.

Get my point? The psychological damage that goes on when our family is dealing with this crisis is only furthered by this, “don’t tell” approach. Get those gatekeeper parents in check! We were told we cannot control our daughter’s life so get parent coaching and fix it on our end.

Be careful, beware and educate yourself as best as you can when it comes to teen depression and self injury.

SELF INJURY – WHAT IS A PARENT TO DO? Parenting teens who are addicted to the maladaptive coping strategy of self mutilation

Doing the best she can

Doing the best she can (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

The number of teens who self injure in the United States is on the rise. What is a parent to do? Therapists, social workers and such have a wide array of suggestions. I have followed them all with little to no results. Truth be told, my teen’s self injury is only getting worse.  Partial hospitalizations, family therapy, individual therapy, medication, parent coaching-you name it, our family has been there and done that.

What is a parent to do?

This site is dedicated to those parents, friends of those who injure and professionals who struggle to find answers.  Why do people mutilate their bodies? Why are there so many children and teenagers taking up this painful behavior? What does the research say? What have parents found to be helpful? What can parents do to help prevent relapse?

So many sites out there are for the person who injures. We welcome those who wish to share their stories.

However…This site was created as a space to discuss and support those of us, who live in constant fear of their loved ones who injure their bodies as a coping mechanism.