Mommy Breaks Up With Her Therapist, a Rant

Life lines for parents with teens who injure can be costly. So how is a parent to find support in this dark world of self-injury without it breaking the bank? We have been with our parent coach for over 4 years now. I can hear her voice when I tell her the funds have run out, “Before the plane crashes, you put the oxygen mask on first before you put it on your kid.”

Day 3: flight to Yazd - inflight safety card

Right? Its stressing me out to think that  I am so dependent on this therapist for parenting a challenging teen.  She does not talk with my teen’s therapist, so what is the point?  I paint half a picture, my teen paints her half of the family dysfunctional picture and these therapists don’t share notes? What is up with that?

I am terrified of letting go of my therapist, but honestly – my medical credit card has reached its limit and it is ONLY June!  My husband is out of work and we have got to continue my teen’s therapy.  Twice a week, sometimes three.

I hate depression in teens – meds have not worked, talk therapy is slow and I often question how well that works. I hate my own depression and anxiety. At times, it feels as if my brain has gotten a life long sentence. Will my own anxiety depression ever end? I have been on antidepressants going on 5 years, with a therapist and coach for going on 5 years and life has only become more challenging as my child moved from a kid who self-injures to a teen who self-injures.

When I lay it out like that, I wonder how truly effective talk therapy and drugs are at getting rid of the the dreadful depression. Aside from all that wondering…I just want to find a cure.  I have read about people who have cured their depression. Going on 5 years of depression in both my kid and in me? Come on!  Enough is enough. This depression has gone on for far too long. And, because we aren’t in a parent support group and exiled to therapy, we know of absolutely no one else who struggles with these issues, therefore we just continue our isolation.  This isolation is depressing in and of itself.

So on to bigger things, I have got to find a place to get support where I no longer feel like some alien from outer space. And what about my teen – I wonder if she, too, feels the same?

Embarrassing parents - swan duckling

Embarrassing parents – swan duckling (Photo credit: @Doug88888)

Ah…What would it be like to find parents out there who have kids suffering from anxiety and depression? Would we be able to side step the “shame” and “guilt” and actually move forward and have honest talks? More importantly, not feel completely alone? Community, support, how about that for therapy and building parenting skills.

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